Morning Musume - 10 My Me review

So, time for yet another review. Morning Musume's 10 My Me. Can it stand up to the nigh unbeatable We Are Buono? Is it as good as any of its predecessors? We shall see...



So, firstly, the cover. Do they look sexy or slutty? I haven't actually decided yet. Aika looks like a cockatiel. Gaki looks frumpy and in her late 30s. Reina's standing on a box. The others don't look too bad, but yea. Odd. The other cover's not much better.

Anyway, let's get down to the review of what's important, the music.

Preliminary: wtf. Not what I was expecting. Not what I wanted. Not anything. A case of... huh?

1. Moonlight Night ～月夜の晩だよ～. Well... the first three words of the album sum it up. "Electro Convulsive Therapy" indeed. The synth in this is... amusing. Not annoying though, which is just as well. The random operatic bit is brilliant. However it's not repeated and this just gets samey very quickly. It's not great, but not bad. Needs something extra, but I'm buggered if I can figure out what it is. Vocally everyone seems to be decent. Then Autotune gets used and marks quickly fall away. I can't forgive its usage. Ever. 5/10

2. 気まぐれプリンセス. This is an amusing as hell single. The lyrics are screwed up to all hell, apparently the inspiration came from Tsunku looking at his daughter's ass. Not sure why he wanted to do that when he has 2 harems of nubile young women to satisfy him, but oh well. Maybe he's into incest. Anyway, the song. It's not bad. It's odd. The guitar parts are interesting, the strings are interesting. The bassline is a nuisance, I wish they'd use real basses again, instead of this bloody sawtooth. The chipmunking doesn't affect me. It's not a brilliant single, but it's by no means the worst ever. 6/10

3. 元気ピカッピカッ! I'm not a fan of this. The "weak" synth kills it. I can't stand the high pitched "breathy" stuff on synths. It just lacks any power and gets on my nerves. Only time it's been pulled off well is on Buono's My Boy, and that had the added win of being metal as fuck. This doesn't have that, so it's tame. I want to go to their studio and delete all these pussy-synths from the memory of their DAWs. Other than the synth, it would be a perfectly good song, but... dammit. It's irritating and gets in the way. Vocally, it's good. Even musically, it's good. The violin break is much, much win. If that synth hadn't been there, 8 or 9, easily. As it is... 5/10

4. 涙ッチ. Fuck yea. This is what I want. Musically, perfect. Vocally, very good. Rock elements lift it nicely. The rap is genius, fuck Nanchatte Renai's, this is where it's at. Piano usage is as it should be, to support and be win. Overall, probably one of the best on here. 9/10

5. 女が目立って なぜイケナイ. Oh fuck make it stop! Another pussy-synth. The acoustic guitars, great. But get rid of the fucking synths! I heard a metal arrangement of this and it was great. This song has potential, but, it's not exploited, at all. The vocals are okay. The violin is cool, but under-utilised. Overall, this is the weakest Momusu single since Aruiteru. Even beats Resonant Blue, which I hate. 2/10

6. 大きい瞳. Ah, much nicer on the ears. Synths that work towards something. Digitised guitar works. Some cool riffs. Vocally, Reina is driving this song along. Then autotune gets used again. Based on Shuffle Date, Sayu doesn't need it. Plus it takes away all her personality. Automatic mark loss. Anyone who puts autotune into a song deserves to be shot. Repeatedly. In the balls. The refrain is nice. Non-annoying breathy synth. So they do know how to do it, just choose to make people's ears bleed. Bastards. 5/10

7. あの日に戻りたい. With Ai and Gaki, the two strongest vocalists in Momusu (not so much a statement of opinion, but fact. Reina may be a 'better' vocalist, but Gaki's voice is deeper, more mature, and thus stronger :P ), I'd expect this to be very good. Starts nicely, like a mid-90's pop song. Pretty much continues in this vein, and, annoyingly, doesn't utilise either Aichan or Gaki to their full potential. Gets a bit boring after a while. Refrain is a nice change of timbre, but other than that throws up nothing special. 6/10

8. なんちゃって恋愛. Momusu's best single since Mikan... which ain't saying much. Had strong sales, but how much of that was promotion, how much was because it was the big 40, and how much because of it being a good song? If we can discount the first 35,000 copies as wota, it's still a decent improvement. Songwise, it's not brilliant, but good enough. Vocally, everyone's good except Sayu and Koharu. It's almost like after singing Kirarin for so long, Koharu forgot how to sing properly. It's my biggest nag. The rap part is pretty decent. Has better line distro than a lot of recent singles, so that's an improvement. 8/10

9. 大阪 美味いねん. I won't digress. I love the 8th gen. But what the fuck is this piece of shit? Tsunku needs to be disemboweled for this. Basically a blues song, with synths. Even the guitar parts can't save it. Osaka-ben lyrics which aren't a patch on Osaka Koi no Uta. The vocals are annoying and patchy. It's a waste of Lin's vocal talents, and I even feel sorry for Aika having to butcher her native accent so... robotically. Junjun sounds bored. Not a single hook to be heard. Lin's constant "yea yea's" are painful. This isn't even a song, just a pasted together pile of crap. 0/10

10. Loving you forever. Now this is how pop should sound. A good, mid-tempo song, minimalistic vocals, good tune. It works, like hardly anything else on this album manages. Sayu's voice is as annoying as always, but at least they didn't autotune the bloody thing this time. Would completely ruin any value this song had. Which is a lot. Overall, one of the better Momusu songs in recent years, and this could have been a perfect single. But no, Tsunku wants to focus on his synth heavy crap. Oh well, not much I can do about it. But this is a proper song. Need more of this kind of thing plz, Tunky. 10/10

11. しょうがない 夢追い人. Another of the wasted potential songs. However, this is better in its current configuration than the other piece of shit, and at least doesn't have annoying synths. The lead guitar saves the hell out of it, and the violin in the refrain does good things. Other than that... lacklustre. Could have been so much more, with a more powerful arrangement. Some more guitars, orchestral hits... would have been epic as fuck. But no, soft pop was the dish of the day, so... 7/10

12. 雨の降らない星では愛せないだろう? (中国語Ver.). Of course, I have to mark this down for laziness. As a song, it's the greatest thing Momusu have done in years, but I still prefer the Peipei leak over the P9D version, this and the ICM version. As a song, it ranks 10/10, but with the same arrangement, with just the addition of an acoustic guitar, I have to take shitloads of marks off for some of the most epic laziness ever. Even uses the same Chinese lyrics as the ICM version. Jun and Lin win vocally, but yea, language change isn't enough to get high marks. 6/10 for laziness.

Overall: Well, this album is weak as an album. Average of the song scores would give this 6.9/10, but considering the broad range of songs from 0 to 10, I have to give it overall less, because it has about as much "flow" as a Now That's What I Call Music album. So, I'll give it my lowest H!P official score yet (though not overall, considering I've only reviewed a few albums :P )...

5.5/10

Comparison Rankings:

Morning Musume. - 4th Ikimasshoi - 10
Buono! - We Are Buono! - 9.7
C-ute - 4 Akogare My Star - 8.5
Buono! - Buono! 2 - 7.5
Morning Musume. - Platinum 9 Disc - 6.5

We Are Buono! review

So, first album review in a while. Last one was P9D. So, Buono's new album.



Preliminary: It's kickass. I'll go a bit more indepth later. But yea. Kickass. Pretty much full-on rock. And wonderfulness. Gorgeousness and gorgeousity made flesh. Oh yes.

1. One Way=My Way. Upbeat pop punk, not a bad way to start I guess. Good music, good vocals, and the lyrics are pretty fun. Nice solo, nice general feel. Sets the tone for the album wonderfully. 9/10

2. Our Songs. Already said this is my second favourite Buono single, so yea. The whole song just works. The heavy as fuck guitars, the spastic hit-everything-possible drum fills, the light-guitar verse, the vocals. The solo (which sounds just as spastic as the drums and very similar to what I produce when I try soloing...), the pointless key change at the end, it's just... brilliant. Even though I can't help myself at the end of the first verse, and I have to do Momo's poke-cheek gesture from the ShugoChara short PV version. 10/10

3. Independent Girl ~ 独立女子であるために. Heavily reminds me of an Aya Hirano song, not that that's a bad thing. Heavy in the right places, soft in the right places. And damn, their voices get stronger each song. The Vocal FX are a slight moan, but don't impact overly (it's not like they use autotune all the fucking time like KAT-TUN nowadays). The solo is a weak one, but still cool, especially into the end chorus. 9/10

4. My Boy. Favourite Buono! single. It's... mental. It's metal, basically. The only reason I had tshirts printed depicting them as Black Metallers. The whole song is just wtfpwn. Even the silly synths, the silly syncopation, and triggered drums. They're a big no-no in metal, but who cares. This wins. It's like, what would happen if you mixed Devin Townsend with Techno and 3 cute Japanese girls? Well... this. It's even got (dare I say it) difficult riffs. And is heavy as fuck. I could praise this thing all day. But for now I'll just say that the solo is so wtf awesome and leave it there. 10/10

5. うらはら. This is where the album slows down a notch. But it's not a bad thing, more a respite. If every song carried on the kickass heaviness from the first four, I think people would lose their heads in explosions. This song is a nice, relaxing song, and has an awesome chorus. Sort of, uplifting rock. Pretty much nails what the grunge bands were going for when they got all soppy and romantic, so awesome for that reason alone. The solo is... odd. Chromatic and different, but it works. 8/10

6. Take it Easy! Now, this is hard for me to say. I hated this song when it came out. It's still my least favourite Buono single. It's just not single quality. However, as an album track it's perfect. It comes after うらはら perfectly, with it's Southern Rock and relaxation theme. Musically, the banjo killed it on the single, but whether it was terrible quality mp3, or a better mix on the album, here it doesn't annoy me so much. The bass is pounding, and the solo recalls Lynyrd Skynyrd at the height of their powers. Sucks to have to eat my words, but yea. It's a good song. 8/10

7. Bravo☆Bravo. The theme of this song is... well... retarded. Hand clapping, basically. However, it has an awesome beat, an awesome riff, and the vocals are decent. Makes me wish the bass sometimes did something more interesting though. That's just a gripe I have with a lot of Buono songs though. The single nearly killed me, due to Airi's wink, but luckily on the album I can listen to it without dying. Introduction of Hammond organ in second verse is a brief spurt of awesome for a prog nerd like me. All the girls do great on their solos. The guitar solo is... amusing, to say the least. Good song though. 8/10

8. カタオモイ。 Not really your usual Buono! lyrical theme, unrequited love... Starts great, and has the one of the most powerful choruses in a Buono song yet. Drums are a bit... uninspired, but oh well. Hammond again makes an appearance, making me get a bit hard. Really, this is a song that falls on it's chorus. Luckily it's a good one. First guitar solo is short and not great. Second is awesome, and I like the mixing they did on it, having it overpower everything else. Third solo is short and the interruption end works a treat. 10/10

9. Blue-Sky-Blue. Really bass heavy, really cool. Back to the "nice" theme though. Reminds me of U2 a bit, even if that probably will earn me a punch from some quarters. PreChorus is good, Chorus not so much, but still a good listen. Random lead guitar parts are always a nice distraction, as is the flange on the rhythm guitars. Vocally, this is... good, but not great. Way too much reverb on their voices for my liking. On the other hand, I like long songs, so more 5 minutes plus songs would go down a treat for me. End solo is great. 8/10

10. 紅茶の美味しい店. This is really the one song that stands in the way of this album getting 10/10. It's... not really Buono. Sounds more like a C-ute song, if I had to say. It's not a bad song, it just doesn't fit with the rest of the album. The other songs all have strong Rock influence. This just... doesn't. Even the "non-rock" songs on Café Buono and Buono2 had random rock phrases here and there. As a song in it's own right, I'd give it 8/10. However, on the album... 6/10

11. タビダチの歌. Now THIS is what I call awesome. Blatant homage to The Beatles at the beginning. Airi singing over an acoustic guitar, and Momo taking over before the rest of the instruments come in... it's like the build up of a dream. Seems to have a feeling of melancholy, but an uplifting spirit. This is, in my opinion, the best Buono song ever. The string quartet push the guitars forward, the girls sing wonderfully, and even the bass does something. Drums aren't much, but they work in the context of the song. The refrain, with the string and guitar solo, is great, as is the vocal solo after. There aren't many songs which can make me feel the urge to cry, but under the right circumstances this might. It's one of them songs that just blows you away. 6 minutes plus, this is what music is all about. The "Lalalala's" add the to Beatles flavour, and the tiny but noticable quote of Pachelbel's Canon in D on the strings at 5:27 makes my classical nerd go apeshit of happiness. 11/10 (if that's possible)

12. We are Buono! ~ Buono!のテーマ. Well, guess what this song's about... But, good, upbeat, pop punk. And heavy. And rather amusing. The lyrics are good, the music's good, it's basically Buono in a nutshell. A very small nutshell. After the epicness of Tabidachi no Uta, this is a return to simplicity. And fun. The self-introduction is great (Miya's fwoooo! is lol, as is the "BUONO!!" at the end). Pretty much a good song, if not mixed nicely. Bassdrums are buried. Hammonds are buried. Other than that, it's cool. 9/10

So... yea. When one has twelve songs and all but one over 8, it's obvious it's a good album. Basically, the damn thing blew me away when I first heard it. Usually it takes a lot for me to rate an album highly. This time, no such luck. This is easily the second best H!P release of all time (4th Ikimasshoi is pretty much unassailable though). With the sole exception of 紅茶の美味しい店, every song fit. Everything was in place. The album was album arranged perfectly. Started off with 4 aggressive numbers, calmed you down with the next two, sped up with Bravo, gave a mix of both hard and soft in カタオモイ。, the next 3 were sad, but powerful, ending in the huge epicness of Tabidachi, and then the lighthearted Buono Theme at the end cools you off. Really fucking brilliant.

9.7/10

Platinum 9 Disc Review

Comparison rankings:

Morning Musume. - 4th Ikimasshoi - 10
C-ute - 4 Akogare My Star - 8.5
Buono! - Buono! 2 - 7.5
Morning Musume. - Platinum 9 Disc - 6.5

Buono! - Our Songs

Yay, the first single-related blog since a long time ago. Anyway.



Basically the gist of this PV is that they're floating, moving too fast and being silly. But who cares, it's Buono! They're all sexy, they're all funny, and they're all cute.

Also, the song is the strongest since My Boy, and my second favourite Buono! a-side thus far. The tune is awesome. The lyrics are much better than the handclap crap of Bravo. And Momo's tshirt is worth extra points.

Thus I'd give this single a steady 9/10. Easily the best H!P single since My Boy. Buono! are now the class act to beat. C-ute have drastically gone downhill, Berryz are as meh as always, and Momusu's new single = wtf???

So yes. Buono! for the win.

Top 20 Favourite Idols - 10-1

So, here is part two of my favourite idol list.

10 - Tsugunaga Momoko

Momoko is basically insane. If you were to put her in a room she would bounce off the walls, if you tied her down she'd probably enjoy it, and if you asked her to do something insane, she'd probably do it for the hell of it. All of this plus Momo's terrible drumming skills, terrible cooking skills, 100% wonderful buttocks and friendly mammaries make her worth a lot of time. My life's ambition is to get her a solo project, produced and aided by Devin Townsend, Kawashima Mirai and Dr. Mikannibal from Sigh, and Boris.

Top 20 Favourite Idols - 20-11

Because I didn't have a definitive list. And also, every now and then I see something which makes me think "She's awesome" and will go straight to near the top of my list.

So... I doubt this list will last very long. It's a bit ephermeral. Not all the girls are H!P. But oh well, here goes...

Koharu's Graudation

So, Koharu is graduating. Yes, I waited a while to post this. I haven't posted anything in ages. Maybe I should start again. Obviously I already am otherwise I wouldn't have posted this, but oh well.

So, anyway. She is leaving. Her choice of new career is to be a model. As seen above, it's clearly something she can pull off without much effort. In fact, that pose above was violated by Dran and myself at Eurowota, and since then we've renamed the wonderful tradition of groping in her honour. Now, when Japanese police accuse you of being a "chikan" on trains after you naughtily grope a young schoolgirl's bottom, you can say, "Chigau. Ore wa chikan ja nai! Ore wa tada koharu desu." (You're wrong, I'm not a chikan. Just a koharu.). The verb form is "to koharu", the present continuous is "koharuing", future is "will koharu" and past is "koharu'd". Now you know.

Anyway, so, my thoughts on it...

I'm glad. This may come as a bit of a surprise, most blogs I've seen seem to be in outright shock or regret. Myself, I don't overly care. Koharu wasn't my favourite. Nor was she my least favourite. I'm just glad that finally something is happening in Momusu. I agree that the 9-person lineup they've had for the past two years has been good. I won't say it's the strongest ever, I think they achieved that when the 4th gen joined, but I digress.

For those who say, "why Koharu?" I say "why not?" She has enough popularity to last on her own, the solo singles are proof of that. She's had 4 years, more than a lot of members had. She's still young enough to make herself a new career. And, of course, Gaki needs someone new to make fun of.

So yea, I'm glad she's gone. Hopefully now the 9th gen will commence and won't include Jang Dayun. Then we can look forward to a new future of Momusu, where people can graduate again :D

EuroWota 2009 - Stockholm

After Buono's cancellation, some of us still had uncancellable tickets and things, so we decided to go to Stockholm and have three days of
hot passionate sex with Swedish chicks
fun with Wota from all over Europe (and an American guy and a Japanese guy). And fun did we have, greatly.

My journey started on Thursday. I was bloody tired and shagged out after a long day turning a photostudio into an exhibition gallery (about 10 people were supposed to help, but only 3 of us turned up, one of which buggered off after lunch, so we had to do 5 times as much work). My journey to the airport started at 11pm, hitching a lift with my younger brother and his amusing mate up to Stansted. On the way up I was subjected to music louder than human ears are meant to withstand, and thus was rather hard of hearing by the end of it. Luckily he didn't play his usual crap and decided instead to play a decent mix of stuff including Pink Floyd, Guns 'n' Roses (from before they got shit), and a load of that funny pop-punk stuff that was popular in the early 00's (like Blink182 and Sum41).

Because this isn't just a H!P blog...

I'm going to do a post on my favourite idol of all.

Though a lot of people probably won't know her (she's only in a Stardust group called Power-Age), she's still brilliant.

Her name is Sakina Kuwae.



Dammit, she's cute. And very loli-like without being underaged (she's really tiny). And bloody funny too. And a good singer. I could list all her good traits but I'd be here all day, so I won't.

She also played Eva (the loli vampire) in the live-action Negima (my favourite manga), which granted her awesome status (she was also in the latest series of Power Rangers' origin, Gekiranger :P )

Anyway, here's a video of her singing in a very nice black outfit :P



Some more links (not fullsize imbedded vids for space saving reasons) of funnies:

Nooo! Not that picture!
3:36 = win

Anyway, it's pretty much impossible to find much Power-Age stuff online nowadays (except a really fucking annoying song where it "features" a load of cats), which annoys me as there was a really funny video with her and another person from Power-Age a while ago. So instead I'll just link to her blog as a final gasp:

Ameblo

HVA FAEN!? aka Japan Expo Stockholm Cancelled

Oh joy. Wondeful joy!

The con has been cancelled, leaving us without a place to witness the ultimate sexiness of Buono. This is just annoying.

I propose we demand that NewNippon give us all cake in lieu of Buono goodness. Or, another Buono gig. Even miyavi or BSC. Dammit, I want something!

(Like Airi and Momo on a plate, yum...)

Anyway, let's riot!

Or have a tea party.

-Krv
With a banging cake, mate.

Morning Musume - Shouganai Yumeoibito

One word:

BOOOOOOORRRRINNGG!

Only redeeming feature of the song is the lead guitar part (which is stolen anyway, I just can't remember from which band). Only redeeming feature of the video is that Junjun and Aika look hot.

Other than that, I confess myself highly disappointed. The bside had better be good...

Why can't Momusu compete with Buono!?

I would say C-ute too, but Bye Bye Bye sucked ass, so I won't. Tsunku's being lazy again, obviously.